How to write a family motto your kids will remember forever

Do you have a family motto? Why do you need a family motto in the first place? What good is it? And how do you write a family motto? In this blog post I’ll cover all these questions and include real-life mottos from families like mine and yours—including the serious, the silly and the downright quirky.

(You’ll never, ever, ever guess what our family motto is—but read on to find out.)

I have to be honest—those wall hangings you find at Ross that proclaim “Live, Laugh, Love” have always seemed straight-up cheesy to me. I’m not one for quaint sayings. Case in point: Whenever I eat a Dove chocolate (which I do many times a day because #teamchocolate), I crumple up the foil wrapper before I can accidentally read the quote on the inside. Their saccharine sentiments make me irrationally angry.

So it may seem weird that I’m writing a blog post on family mottos. Even more, you might be wondering what family mottos have to do with family travel. Hang with me, though. It’ll make sense soon enough.

But first:

What is a family motto?

A family motto is a short, succinct saying that sums up what’s most important to your family. It makes your family’s core values concrete and easy to reference.

You might already have a family motto and not even realize it. Do you find yourself saying the same thing to your kids because when you reach for wisdom, it’s right there?

(I’m not talking about the things I find myself repeating every day, things like “We don’t hit” and “Did you wipe?” Those would be kind of depressing family mottos.)

But you might say something like, “We are safe, kind and courageous,” or even something silly like “Adventure, onward!”

How to write a family motto

If you don’t already have a family motto, it’s easy to craft one. Here’s how to write a family motto.

1. Think of what you want your kids to hear inside their heads for the rest of their life. When they’re in college and in a tough situation, what family wisdom do you want them to remember?
2. Write down your family’s 5 most important values. They might be honesty or compassion, bravery or togetherness. Get the rest of your family to chip in with their ideas, too—you’ll learn a lot from their suggestions, I guarantee it.
3. Look at your list. Can you see a connection between a few of these?
4. Take a stab at drafting a sentence that addresses at least one of these values. Phrase it in a positive way. For example, if you want to talk about the whole family chipping in, don’t phrase it like, “No one in our family goes it alone.” Instead, try, “We all help out because we are stronger together.”
5. Write a whole bunch of these sentences. It might take a while to land on one that feels just right. Heck, you might even get a series of them—which is even better! Keep the family motto short and simple.
6. If you already have a phrase you repeat often, that might be your family motto (or at least one of them). Feel free to use one that you grew up with, too, or modify it to fit your family.
7. When you write a family motto, share it with the rest of the fam. Then don’t be shy to repeat it often! It’ll become part of your family culture.
8. You can pay someone on etsy to design your family motto for a frame (I like this shop for custom hand lettering), do it yourself or make it a family art project. Then display your wisdom in your house—chances are, your friends and relatives will ask about it and you’ll inspire them to put their own family wisdom into words!

The origin of my family motto

This is a family travel blog, so of course I write about all sorts of topics through that lens. Family mottos are no different.

Here’s where I tell you our family motto. Don’t laugh.

(Ok, you can totally laugh. I know it’s ridiculous.)

Never miss an opportunity to pee in the woods

Before you click away as fast as you can, let me tell you the story behind this nugget of wisdom.

My Uncle Dick, who wasn’t actually my uncle by blood, was my dad’s best friend. They got into all sorts of shenanigans and hijinks in Peoria, Illinois, where they were both teaching high school—and where my dad met my mom. They’d often go fishing, hiking, camping or hunting and they always—always—came back with stories that they’d tell and retell, laughing so hard they cried.

But soon, Uncle Dick was in a serious accident that left him paralyzed from his eyes down. From that point on, he’d write our family letters using a state-of-the-art (at the time) computer that tracked his eye movement to type. He’d share jokes, tell us what movies he’d watch and, of course, relive some of the good times he and my dad shared.

That left my dad to tell Uncle Dick stories. And pretty much every one of them included the adage, “Never miss an opportunity to pee in the woods.”

I have lived by that motto ever since.

To me, something that—at first listen—might sound crass or silly is actually all about living life to the fullest in this moment, taking advantage of every opportunity, and not taking yourself too seriously. And that is what my family is all about.

The adage paid off: My husband still tells the story of one of our first dates, when we went disc golfing together. I had to pee but instead of going into the gross port-a-potty, I squatted behind a tree (and told Hubs about Uncle Dick later). He was impressed—and although that didn’t lead to him proposing, I have a feeling it played a very small part in his growing love for me.

(How’s that for romance!)

How do family mottos and family travel connect?

Since getting married and having two kids of my own, I’ve adopted Uncle Dick’s saying as our own family motto. I say it several times a week when we go hiking, camping or even just playing outside at our house.

We’re an outdoorsy family. I love nothing more than exploring a new place outside, watching my kids examine salamanders or banana slugs. I’m happiest with a big sky overhead and no roads in sight. So naturally, we all need to be comfortable peeing in the woods.

Yes, I’m proud that both of my kids aren’t the least bit squeamish about popping a squat off the trail. But I want my girls to remember Uncle Dick’s saying as more than just instructions on where to go #1.

“Never miss an opportunity to pee in the woods” speaks to my family’s love of the outdoors. But most importantly it speaks to the value of enjoying the present because in the end, that’s all you have.

My Uncle Dick, sadly, didn’t have as many opportunities to pee in the woods—or do a million other things—as he deserved. He lived a long and full life after he was paralyzed and then died in 2009. But today, my family and I do have opportunities to explore, invent, imagine, see and do.

I think of Uncle Dick often. Sometimes I compose letters to him in my head. They start out, “Dear Uncle Dick, Today we went to a lake the girls decided should be called Butterfly Lake instead of Frog Lake because as soon as we got there we were surrounded by butterflies!”

Or “Dear Uncle Dick, Today Peeper fell down on the trail and Kiwi tried to pick her up. They’re becoming such good friends.”

Or “Dear Uncle Dick, The girls picked up daddy long legs, roly polies and snails today. They’re so brave—you would have loved to meet them.”

Live your family motto

I haven’t yet framed our family motto, though maybe that’s something I’ll gift myself for the holidays.

No matter what your family motto is—no matter if it’s serious or silly—live it. We never know how much time we have, and we’re all better off living as Uncle Dick did: fully in the present, and always with a smile on his face.

Do you have a family motto? Is there someone in your family who inspires you to live your best life?